I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Shame - the story of my life.
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