we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
as a side note pls kill me
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
