idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
