Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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