Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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