So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
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