When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
