what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
