we have officially lost it.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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