Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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