I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
