would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
