It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
