Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
