but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
