if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
