Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize