she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
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I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Green mimosas i think yes
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
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i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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