you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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