From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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