I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize