wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
