i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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