He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
