i just wanna soil my oats bro
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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