i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
