It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
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