Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
We need to rekindle our bromance
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
