Why are handjobs necessary in class?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize