I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
