don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
