I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
