I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
