this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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