I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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