similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
