Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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