Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
