I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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