32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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