We're like a lot better than the average bears
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
