she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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