The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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