none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Bring me that man meat
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
