I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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