At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
