Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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