We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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