Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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