u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
