Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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